When we first started homeschooling, we picked a classical curriculum that required five days of school work. Since I had just pulled my son out of a parochial school, I took the the five-day school model as an assumed standard. My son must do five full days of schoolwork to learn just as he had in school.

However, that plan didn’t work for long. I quickly discovered that my son was behind in math and couldn’t keep up with the schedule for the classical homeschool curriculum. Soon we were both frustrated.

When families begin homeschooling, it seems natural for moms to step in and do the bulk of the teaching, organizing, and planning. As the primary or sole wage earner for the family, dads are considered the principal of the homeschool. However, this situation also puts dads at a disadvantage. They come home at the end of the workday and don’t know what went on or how the children are performing in school.

I have three of them—each one with her own brand of anxiety. It’s an ever-present reality we’ve learned to live with in our homeschool. On good days, it’s pretty manageable: we acknowledge the fear, address it, and move on. On bad days, it’s crippling: there are tears, stomach aches, cancellations and despair.